Friday, December 04, 2009
Don't need another perfect line
Vampire Diaries reopens next year.
I'm like, WHAT THE HELL.
This is not cool.
Anyway, I have this wedding to attend tomorrow, so...
Yeah.
Life's a blast now.
Really.
I'm not swimming in to-do list after to-do list.
Really.
I'm like, WHAT THE HELL.
This is not cool.
Anyway, I have this wedding to attend tomorrow, so...
Yeah.
Life's a blast now.
Really.
I'm not swimming in to-do list after to-do list.
Really.
Labels: this time
11:54 PM
Thursday, December 03, 2009
Do you remember the times?
My brother has always been the sweet one, always thinking about others first.
That's one of the reasons I love him, even as I roll my eyes at another one of his attempts to try and make the world a better place for the rest of mankind.
He's the one making sure everyone's feelings get considered, especially since my other brother and I have no qualms about feelings and the whatnots that get hurt.
**
I keep dreaming...
And it's always about the same person.
Just different scenes.
It's crazy.
I think I need more sleep.
**
I have a love-hate relationship with band, I swear.
Sometimes, it's just easier to not care about it.
**
And, oh look.
Gossip Girl just got THIS much more interesting.
And predictable.
LAUGHS.
That's one of the reasons I love him, even as I roll my eyes at another one of his attempts to try and make the world a better place for the rest of mankind.
He's the one making sure everyone's feelings get considered, especially since my other brother and I have no qualms about feelings and the whatnots that get hurt.
**
I keep dreaming...
And it's always about the same person.
Just different scenes.
It's crazy.
I think I need more sleep.
**
I have a love-hate relationship with band, I swear.
Sometimes, it's just easier to not care about it.
**
And, oh look.
Gossip Girl just got THIS much more interesting.
And predictable.
LAUGHS.
Labels: dillydome
10:45 PM
Tuesday, December 01, 2009
They got their mind on the money.
I need to find a way to concentrate on Economics.
The only thing I keep thinking of is how much I need to do for camp and how little time there is to do it.
Basically, I wanna concentrate fully on camp.
And nothing else.
So basically, I wish I didn't have a band concert next week.
And band camp on thursday.
Because band camp is another way of saying 'I wanna keep you in school to practice until 11 and tire you out so you can play horribly for the concert.'
Actually, I'm getting extremely sick of band. I still love playing, and I know I'll miss the songs I can play once there's no more band, but it's the other things that make me sick.
Make me wanna throw up.
If it wasn't for the horrible fact that the Singapore Education system requires you to maintain a CCA, I'd quit.
I wanna play. I really do. But all this stress is not worth it.
Plus, it seems like I only have one or two true friends in the band now.
Thank goodness it ends next week.
I can't wait for band camp...
..... to be over.
On another note, I decided to use today to do all the stuff that I'm supposed to do before I spend the rest of this week tiring my lips out on my instrument.
And I haven't finished.
Joy is my middle name.
If this blog is supposed to reflect my emotions in life too, you'd think I was a horribly scarred kid always in the midst of her period.
So I present to you the irony of my life. :))
(People ask me how I can stay so cheerful most of the time. Now you know why. :) )
The only thing I keep thinking of is how much I need to do for camp and how little time there is to do it.
Basically, I wanna concentrate fully on camp.
And nothing else.
So basically, I wish I didn't have a band concert next week.
And band camp on thursday.
Because band camp is another way of saying 'I wanna keep you in school to practice until 11 and tire you out so you can play horribly for the concert.'
Actually, I'm getting extremely sick of band. I still love playing, and I know I'll miss the songs I can play once there's no more band, but it's the other things that make me sick.
Make me wanna throw up.
If it wasn't for the horrible fact that the Singapore Education system requires you to maintain a CCA, I'd quit.
I wanna play. I really do. But all this stress is not worth it.
Plus, it seems like I only have one or two true friends in the band now.
Thank goodness it ends next week.
I can't wait for band camp...
..... to be over.
On another note, I decided to use today to do all the stuff that I'm supposed to do before I spend the rest of this week tiring my lips out on my instrument.
And I haven't finished.
Joy is my middle name.
If this blog is supposed to reflect my emotions in life too, you'd think I was a horribly scarred kid always in the midst of her period.
So I present to you the irony of my life. :))
(People ask me how I can stay so cheerful most of the time. Now you know why. :) )
Labels: addiction to pain
7:31 PM
Monday, November 30, 2009
Sometimes I'm scared of you.
On this day, God wants you to know...
... that tonight you can turn your worries to God, and have a good night's sleep. You've been worrying too much about the future lately. So tonight, go ahead, put your faith in God, and just have a peaceful evening and a restful sleep.
I found out that one of my favourite, loyal readers is back and loyally reading. :D
So this post shall be 'Mel-friendly'. Dedicated to the dear sweet girl that brightened my day just by talking to me on MSN.
Had an awesome day with Shu fen. We bought ties from Raffles and ate at BnJ's. It's always nice talking to her. :)
Sometimes, you need to take a step back and realise that your life may have its crazy moments, but the other 90% of the time, THAT'S what you live for.
I have really been tiring myself out too much. Just bent on making sure everything turns out fine.
I should stop worrying.
I've done enough.
Let God do the 'worrying' for me.
:))
Hope this was Mel-friendly enough! ILY Chia Yan Ling!
... that tonight you can turn your worries to God, and have a good night's sleep. You've been worrying too much about the future lately. So tonight, go ahead, put your faith in God, and just have a peaceful evening and a restful sleep.
I found out that one of my favourite, loyal readers is back and loyally reading. :D
So this post shall be 'Mel-friendly'. Dedicated to the dear sweet girl that brightened my day just by talking to me on MSN.
Had an awesome day with Shu fen. We bought ties from Raffles and ate at BnJ's. It's always nice talking to her. :)
Sometimes, you need to take a step back and realise that your life may have its crazy moments, but the other 90% of the time, THAT'S what you live for.
I have really been tiring myself out too much. Just bent on making sure everything turns out fine.
I should stop worrying.
I've done enough.
Let God do the 'worrying' for me.
:))
Hope this was Mel-friendly enough! ILY Chia Yan Ling!
Labels: Mel-friendly-ish
11:30 PM
Sunday, November 29, 2009
When all I needed was the truth.
Suddenly, I've become part of the past...
And everyone knows I'm in over my head with eight seconds left in overtime..
I wish you were a stranger I could disengage...
You find another friend and you discard.
Over my head - The Fray
OneRepublic is soon becoming the band to listen to when I'm emo.
That means I'm pretty much listening to it everyday now.
I felt a whole lot better this weekend. Even though the games recee was a bit of a mind-drainer, my darlings made it up to me as usual just by being there.
Sleeping over with the girls and just talking away about anything and everything was exactly what I needed. I felt so happy last night.
"I got angry at you. So I what you?"
"Slap."
"Another word. Sounds something like it!"
"Slah-p."
Taboo with Azriel has to be the most entertaining thing. Somewhat.
J: "I was wondering if you went to your room."
N: "I DID go to my room."
A: "Huh. Then where did you go?"
Belle is deaf.
S: I can't balance very well! I'm not wearing flats!
A: I thought you were wearing your new shoes...
S: I am..
A: I thought they were heels..
S: They ARE..
A: Then why you say you wearing flats?
See above comment in italics
S: Belle's cold sore's so big, it should have its own personality. I like 'Frank'.
J: 'Norman's a nicer name.
S: Frank!
J: Okay. Frank Norman, okay?
S: Yeah! Sounds awesome!
This is how we named Belle's cold sore.
S [to anyone who came along]: Have you met Frank Norman?
Cuz' I'm mean. :)
N: You must excuse me, my bathroom's quite small. (she means the one in her bedroom)
A: Don't complain! I don't have one at all.
J: You don't have a bathroom at home?
Cuz' Belle's very cute sometimes.
And now that the weekend is over, I can look forward to the week.
Which means I'm not really looking forward to much.
At least we had our fun.
I love my girls.
The hope is we have so much to feel good about.
And everyone knows I'm in over my head with eight seconds left in overtime..
I wish you were a stranger I could disengage...
You find another friend and you discard.
Over my head - The Fray
OneRepublic is soon becoming the band to listen to when I'm emo.
That means I'm pretty much listening to it everyday now.
I felt a whole lot better this weekend. Even though the games recee was a bit of a mind-drainer, my darlings made it up to me as usual just by being there.
Sleeping over with the girls and just talking away about anything and everything was exactly what I needed. I felt so happy last night.
"I got angry at you. So I what you?"
"Slap."
"Another word. Sounds something like it!"
"Slah-p."
Taboo with Azriel has to be the most entertaining thing. Somewhat.
J: "I was wondering if you went to your room."
N: "I DID go to my room."
A: "Huh. Then where did you go?"
Belle is deaf.
S: I can't balance very well! I'm not wearing flats!
A: I thought you were wearing your new shoes...
S: I am..
A: I thought they were heels..
S: They ARE..
A: Then why you say you wearing flats?
See above comment in italics
S: Belle's cold sore's so big, it should have its own personality. I like 'Frank'.
J: 'Norman's a nicer name.
S: Frank!
J: Okay. Frank Norman, okay?
S: Yeah! Sounds awesome!
This is how we named Belle's cold sore.
S [to anyone who came along]: Have you met Frank Norman?
Cuz' I'm mean. :)
N: You must excuse me, my bathroom's quite small. (she means the one in her bedroom)
A: Don't complain! I don't have one at all.
J: You don't have a bathroom at home?
Cuz' Belle's very cute sometimes.
And now that the weekend is over, I can look forward to the week.
Which means I'm not really looking forward to much.
At least we had our fun.
I love my girls.
The hope is we have so much to feel good about.
Labels: almost lover
9:07 PM
Friday, November 27, 2009
Don't you know I suffer
I'm facing depression as of now.
I don't wanna do anything.
I wanna quit band. I wanna quit camp. I wanna quit acapella.
I wanna sit at home and relax.
Maybe even do some studying.
I don't even wanna get involved in so many things ever again.
I've learnt my lesson.
I won't do it again.
Please, Lord. Don't punish me. I knew not what I was getting myself into when I signed up.
Nothing is fun now, Lord. I don't need fun, actually. I need joy. Nothing brings me joy anymore, Lord. I'm wallowing in a sea of self-pity and I feel so pathetic that I need to blog and 'complain' about my over-commitments to everything but I can't take it anymore, Lord.
I want to share my gifts with the world, but does it have to come at such a heavy price?
Everyone wants my 100%, Lord. I don't have that. I can't give it to anyone. And everyone gets hurt in the end.
Is it worth it, Lord?
Is it worth the pain and effort just to give everyone only about 50% of what I can offer?
Sometimes I give even less.
I'm disappointing so many people, Lord.
People who used to count on me; people who saw someone in me and decided that I was worth the time.
Now, they probably realise it was a big mistake in relying on me.
I don't want to do this anymore.
Please, Lord.
I dont' want to hurt anyone anymore.
Be with me as I complete what I have to do.
Give me the strength, the patience, the guidance.
Let me learn. And learn well.
And I promise I'll never do something as stupid as this ever again in my life if I ever can help it.
I don't wanna do anything.
I wanna quit band. I wanna quit camp. I wanna quit acapella.
I wanna sit at home and relax.
Maybe even do some studying.
I don't even wanna get involved in so many things ever again.
I've learnt my lesson.
I won't do it again.
Please, Lord. Don't punish me. I knew not what I was getting myself into when I signed up.
Nothing is fun now, Lord. I don't need fun, actually. I need joy. Nothing brings me joy anymore, Lord. I'm wallowing in a sea of self-pity and I feel so pathetic that I need to blog and 'complain' about my over-commitments to everything but I can't take it anymore, Lord.
I want to share my gifts with the world, but does it have to come at such a heavy price?
Everyone wants my 100%, Lord. I don't have that. I can't give it to anyone. And everyone gets hurt in the end.
Is it worth it, Lord?
Is it worth the pain and effort just to give everyone only about 50% of what I can offer?
Sometimes I give even less.
I'm disappointing so many people, Lord.
People who used to count on me; people who saw someone in me and decided that I was worth the time.
Now, they probably realise it was a big mistake in relying on me.
I don't want to do this anymore.
Please, Lord.
I dont' want to hurt anyone anymore.
Be with me as I complete what I have to do.
Give me the strength, the patience, the guidance.
Let me learn. And learn well.
And I promise I'll never do something as stupid as this ever again in my life if I ever can help it.
Labels: intangible imperfections
11:52 PM
Thursday, November 26, 2009
With eight seconds left in overtime
I'll NEVER survive without a maid. I've spend YEARS shaking my head and tsking at others who can't seem to fend for themselves.. only to discover that I'm exactly like them.
Oh happiness.
My household can't even survive one DAY without a maid. Shouting and frustration presented themselves at so many junctures today, I can't even keep count.
And I'm watching New Moon tomorrow with Chuck. :))))
And someone stole my bike. :(((
Oh happiness.
My household can't even survive one DAY without a maid. Shouting and frustration presented themselves at so many junctures today, I can't even keep count.
And I'm watching New Moon tomorrow with Chuck. :))))
And someone stole my bike. :(((
Labels: crime is a crime
11:30 PM
Just Moi`
The name is Stephanie Michelle de Souza. Currently studying in Temasek Junior College, trying to claw my way through the education system.
I am Eurasian and my family line traces back to the 17th century.
I may not be perfect but i love myself just because I am.
I may not be the classiest but i know my manners well.
I want to be I-have-no-freaking-clue and STILL give my mother the best years of her life. I also want to help the less fortunate.
I couldn't give a damn about world environment, but neither can the other 99% of the world anyway.
There is only one guy in the world that I will never stop living for at any given time. That is the LORD. Even if i never am worthy of his
This is a way to rant out my feelings.
What's on my blog stays on my blog.
That way, no one can comment
Other than that, have a great life!
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